Many people are carriers of issues that have never been resolved. The genesis of the grievances stem from their childhood. Thus, offence is a major factor that affects the lives of people who have never been able to confront their internal problems and will always blame others.
Offended people violate their spouses, children, siblings, friends and work colleagues. They will hurt fellow congregants and neighbours in the estate.
Offended people tend to hurt others but will never take responsibility for the actions they have done to affect others. They will blame everyone else but themselves for the actions that they have done to hurt people.
Their perception of delegated authority is not wholesome. To them, delegated authority is a form of manipulation and control exercised by those who are mandated to oversee their lives. The truth is that most offended people are in actual fact very manipulative and controlling.
Unfortunately, most pastors have no clue what they are dealing with whenever they are handling offended individuals who have no understanding of their actual problems. Many times pastors have fallen victim to the misdeeds of offended individuals in church. Pastors get blamed for what they know nothing about. They’re used as scapegoats to justify the actions of offended people who have no regard for the truth.
How well have you dealt with the offences of your childhood past or teenage hood? What you don’t confront will destroy you and ruins the lives of others especially those around you.
Maybe it’s time you faced your past trauma and deal with the actual reality of what happened to you rather than blaming others for your past trauma or emotional damage. You need to be very honest with yourself about what happened to you in the past, lest you forget that you are responsible for what you feel.
Healing doesn’t happen when you constantly blame others for what happened to you. You can’t heal from the past experiences of pain when you are busy trying to blame those who offended you. Healing goes beyond the surface and you must acknowledge that you are responsible for your actions and the present experience that you have.
Sometimes we are traumatized by our own mistakes but are quick to blame others instead of acknowledging that you are the one that misbehaved and that’s why you ended up being subjected to some form of punitive actions by your parents or even teachers in school.
Until you accept responsibility for what you did, you won’t appreciate the consequences of your actions and you will be a prisoner of your past.
Bishop Gobanga J.O. 
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